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October 2002 Newsletter
Hello and welcome to the October Shaping Your Destiny newsletter
- dedicated to self-transformation and to your success.
In this issue, you'll find
1) What's new at ShapingYourDestiny.com
2) How Rules Rule Your Life
3) Acceptance
4) Finding Your Ideal Career
5) Wealth Building Tip
6) Health Tip
Enjoy this issue, and don't forget to send me any feedback, questions,
or comments! Communicate your successes and tips to everyone here
who wants to shape their destiny.
To your success,
Jason
What's New?
This month has been busy at Shaping Your Destiny. There's a new enhanced
forum area, with many new topics and much easier to use. Please take
a moment to visit it and start some conversations. You can find the
forums at
http://www.shapingyourdestiny.com/forum/index.php
Some more articles have also been added to the articles section
(http://www.shapingyourdestiny.com/articles.htm). Keep your suggestions
for improvement and additions coming, and I'll endeavour to add
more to them.
How Rules Rule Your Life
As we all have values that we live life by, whether we live up
to these values is determined by a series of rules that are attached
to the value. For example, we may value success, and the rule that
we have attached to success is that to be successful we must earn
more than $1,000,000 a year. Another person may have a rule for
success saying that if they wake up each morning then they are successful.
Yet another person may have a complex web of rules relating to success
that ensures they never are successful by their own rules.
Most of these rules are lodged in our subconscious and we are
never really aware of them on the conscious level. So you can see
that it is incredibly useful for us if we become aware of these
rules. It is even more beneficial for us if we can become aware
of these rules and then change them to ensure we meet our values.
When changing a rule it is important that you choose rules that
are achievable, but also give you room to grow and move forwards.
So let's start by finding out what some of your rules are. Write
out your rules for each of the following points. You are writing
down what conditions need to be met in order for you to feel a success,
a failure, or so on.
- For success
- For failure
- For being loved
- For being happy
When you have written these down, write out what rules you would
like to have for these. One person I know had this rule for being
happy, "If I wake up each morning able to breath." Now that's an
easy rule to meet isn't it? Many of our rules are complex, hard
to meet and often contradictory.
By defining these rules we can gain a valuable insight into the
way our minds work, which allows us to take control of your life.
If you have the time and inclination, why not write down some of
the rules in other areas of your life too?
Remember also that other people have rules, so when you are dealing
with people their rules apply too. For example, your partner will
have rules for being loved within a relationship, your boss will
have rules for you being successful, and your children will have
rules for you being a good parent and for their success. If you
can find out other peoples rules then you can use them in your dealings
with them to be more fulfilled and clear in your communication.
Acceptance
Accept life as it is. Be joyful, Without any reason.
In a village where the great Zen Master Hakuin was living, a girl
became pregnant. Her father bullied her for the name of her lover,
and, in the end, to escape punishment, she told him it was Hakuin.
The father said no more, but when the time came and the child
was born, he at once took the baby to Hakuin and threw it down.
"It seems that this is your child," he said, and he piled on every
insult and sneer at the disgrace of the affair.
The Zen Master only said, "Oh, is that so?" and took the baby
in his arms. Wherever he went thereafter, he took the baby, wrapped
in the sleeve of his ragged robe. During rainy days and stormy nights
he would go out to beg milk from the neighbouring houses. Many of
his disciples, considering him fallen, turned against him and left.
And Hakuin said not a word.
Meantime the mother found she could not bear the agony of separation
from her child. She confessed the name of the real father, and her
own father rushed to Hakuin and prostrated himself, begging over
and over for forgiveness.
Hakuin said only, "Oh, is that so?" and gave him the child back.
This is acceptance. This is tathata. Whatsoever life brings is
okay, absolutely okay. This is the mirror like quality-nothing is
good, nothing is bad, all is divine. Accept life as it is. Accepting
it, desires disappear, tensions disappear, discontent disappears.
Accepting it as it is one starts feeling very joyful and for no
reason at all.
When joy has a reason, it is not going to last long. When joy
is without any reason, it is going to be there forever.
(source unknown)
Finding Your Ideal Career
In the current climate, many people are looking away from the
traditional job market towards working for themselves. The massive
redundancies and job-insecurity has caused many people to radically
rethink their career plans. With the ever rising cost of living,
many would be happy just to earn extra money to support their family
and pay the bills.
In this article, you will discover what you enjoy in life and
how to turn it into a money making opportunity, and maybe even a
full-time career. Your only limitations are those you impose upon
yourself! At the very least, what you learn will help you to be
happier with your current job.
First of all, a little exercise to get you started. Make a list
of everything and anything you really enjoy and are passionate about.
This can be anything at all, from playing with Lego through to planning
projects or programming code. Write down everything you think of,
no matter how silly or pointless you think it may be. They are all
important and must be included on your list.
Go through the list and ask yourself whether you truly are passionate
about each one. Ask the question, "If someone offered to pay me
to do this, would I be happy?" If after thinking about it you would
not, then cross it off your list.
Look at each item on your list and ask yourself what you enjoy
about it. You may enjoy the peace and tranquillity of gardening,
or the fast paced life style of project management. Write this down
too by each item.
The why you enjoy it is very important because it gives you an
insight into your inner workings. When you understand what it is
that you enjoy about something, you can look at applying that specifically
to your life and current job to improve your happiness. If you like
peace and tranquillity but your job is hectic, you could take time
out for a walk in a park or to meditate to bring into your job peace
and tranquillity. You could make sure you take a lunch break and
switch your phone off.
Once you have identified the things you are passionate about,
write down next to each one how much time a month you spend doing
them. You may love surfboarding but only manage to go once a month
or you may be passionate about cooking yet have to live on fast
food because of your job.
From now on, make an effort every single month to spend some time
doing the things that you are passionate about. You will find that
your level of happiness improves, your energy increases, and that
life will feel so much better because you are doing things you love.
Carry your list around with you for at least a week, adding to
it each time you think of something you are passionate about. Then
repeat the above for each new item, analysing it and understanding
it.
Do you have what it takes?
Whatever your current job situation, working for yourself can
be a very appealing option. But the question is, 'do you have what
it takes to work for yourself?' Not everyone does, but the good
news is that the necessary skills can be learnt.
To successfully work for yourself you need to have all of the
following skills to some degree. The better you are at each skill,
the more chance you have of being successful on your own.
Motivated: You must be able to motivate yourself and to not rely
on others to push you along. When you work for yourself, there isn't
going to be a manager there telling you what you need to do, when
you need to do it by, and providing you support and guidance when
you need it. Working for yourself, it is all your responsibility.
Belief: You must believe in yourself and in what you are doing
or the product you are selling. It is very difficult to do well
at something you do not fully believe in. Your belief and passion
about what you do comes across to your customers, which helps immensely
in building their confidence and in turn, your business.
Development Time: It is important to spend time developing yourself.
Many technical people forget to develop soft skills, and vice versa.
Aim to attend at least two courses a year - one soft skills and
one technical. Also regularly read relevant books to develop these
skills. You have to stay one step ahead of the crowd to be a phenomenal
success.
Determined: You must be determined to succeed and not to give
up. There are times when it will be tough, but you're the boss and
the one solely responsible for making it good again.
Inter-personal skills: Working for yourself doesn't mean you will
be locked in a room alone. You will often have to interact with
others. Good inter-personal skills will make this experience more
rewarding and help you get the best from people.
Communication skills: Both written and spoken communication skills
are important. Often in the market place today, words are the key
to the success of your business. Therefore, spend time developing
your skills in this area - it will pay you back many fold to do
so.
How many of the above skills do you currently have? Do you feel
you are weak in any of these areas? If so, then strengthen them
by attending courses or reading some relevant books. Being strong
in all the above areas is not necessary for personal success, but
will help to make it much easier.
Look at the list of things you are passionate about, and think
about how the above skills can be applied to and compliment these.
Finding your ideal career
Get your list of things you are passionate about out again and
take a new sheet of paper. Write the first item on your list at
the top of the new paper. Underneath it, brainstorm all the jobs
you can think of that involve it. Let your imagination run riot
and be as creative as you can. Each item you have written down will
offer you many possibilities. You can also use the reasons you enjoy
the item to help in this exercise.
Using gardening as an example, you could write down: Gardener,
author, teacher, TV presenter, landscape designer, tree doctor,
and farmer, just to mention a few.
Still on the same item from your list, write down all the ways
you can think of to make money from it.
With our gardening example this may be growing and selling plants
or vegetables, or doing gardening for people in your neighbourhood.
There are of course many other opportunities here. Again, be creative
and imaginative and think outside of your normal box.
These are all things that you can start to do right now or fairly
soon, if you wanted, to begin to earn money and start to move your
career away from what you are currently doing.
Repeat the above exercise for each item that is on your list.
Over the next few weeks keep adding to these lists. This exercise
has the added advantage of stimulating your mind to be creative,
which results in your coming up with many more great ideas - often
when you least expect it, so make sure you write them all down.
The results of these exercises will be a list of what you enjoy
doing, why you enjoy doing and a list of possible careers and money
making opportunities that you would really enjoy doing. You do not
have to make a massive move and quit your job this instance. You
can take your time, and slowly begin building your own business,
or just earn a bit of extra money to help pay the bills whilst keeping
your current job. You can also use this list to determine what career
is best for you and begin planning a move to this new career.
Ask yourself the question, "If I could do anything at all, what
would it be?" The answer to this question will help you determine
which of the items on your list to pursue first. It is important
not to spread yourself too thinly otherwise you may find that nothing
ever gets done. Once you have decided which way to go you must do
a goal setting exercise and work out your route to your target.
Goal setting workbooks and articles can be found at http://www.shapingyourdestiny.com.
Pursuing your passion means living life to the full. It means
waking up each morning and looking forward to working. It means
more energy, more fun and feeling more alive. Sadly today many of
us are working jobs we would rather not be doing. Perhaps it is
time that you took advantage of the shifting economy and lived your
passion instead of dreaming it?
Wealth Building Tip
This months tip for building your wealth is the 10% rule. There
are universal laws of abundance, and as stated in many religions,
if you give, you will receive. To take this further, if you give
what you want to receive, you will receive it back many fold.
If you want to receive money, give it away, and so it will come
back to you. The question of the ages is how much do you give away?
If you look at the wealthiest people in the world you will find
they give vast sums of money away. It's not just for tax purposes
and to make them look like good people. They are aware of the universal
laws of abundance, and by giving, so they receive.
The magic figure to give away to good causes is 10% of what you
earn.
You may be at a stage where you just can't afford to give away
10%, in which case, give away what money you can afford. Instead
of money, you can give away your time or services - many good causes
are desperate for volunteers to help out in this way.
Health Tip
"We are what we eat" is a very true statement that applies to
us all. It is the reason why heart disease and cancer now affects
1 in 4 people in the western countries.
By eating a balanced and healthy diet we can prolong our life,
reduce our illnesses and increase our energy and enjoyment of life.
This doesn't mean take a draconian approach and avoid all the
foods you enjoy, it just means being sensible. Instead of a large
pizza have a smaller one with a salad. Instead of snacking on a
chocolate bar, eat some fruit instead.
Your approach to healthy eating will be unique to you. Find the
balance that suits you best for your life style. Spend some time
investigating what is in the food you eat. Pay particular attention
to the additives and sweeteners in all your products - some of these
are not what they seem.
Make your own judgements and decide what is best for you. Don't
follow the herd and eat what you are told. Question what is being
put in your food and other products, and use what is good for you.
Many cosmetics, household and bathroom products are renowned for
their toxins such as Propylene Glycol. Some of these are used in
anti-freeze and industrial cleaners, yet we use them on our bodies.
If you are interested in toxin free products then visit http://www.shapingyourdestiny.com/neways
for some information on healthy alternatives to what you are already
using.
I hope you've enjoyed this issue of the Shaping Your Destiny newsletter.
Have a phenomenal month, and I'll see you back here again in the
next issue.
Live your dreams!
Jason
Jason@shapingyourdestiny.com
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Achieve your dreams. Discover the secrets of life.
Live the life you've always desired.
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All Material (c) Jason Johns unless otherwise stated
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